Wednesday, December 26, 2012

The Mayans Lied to Us Hence the Wait for The End of the World Continues

Hello, my name is *insert name here* and I am one of the December 21st end of the world survivors. If there is still anyone else out there, anyone at all, please let me know, I will find you.

Got a text message like that this morning. Thought if I am still alive on December 22, I would be saying this to people. Like posting this message on a wall somewhere or try to send it through the internet (provided the internet is still there and still works) or maybe post it in a way that helicopters flying high can see it, like with coconuts or something, like they show in the movies. Okay, I am exaggerating a bit with the message written in coconuts for flying helicopters to catch. If they are any survivors, last thing they would be doing would be flying helicopters as the first point on their agenda will be survival, I guess.

Anyways, turns out this is all make believe. The world didn’t end. The Zombie Apocalypse never occurred. Wished it actually could’ve been real. That the world did end on December 21 and the Zombie Apocalypse occurred. I mean, the world has been around for so long. High time it ended, LOL. I would’ve been witnessing a once in a life time event, history in the making. Okay okay, on a more serious note, I seriously thought the world was going to end on December 21 like the Mayans told us it would. Thought maybe a nuclear explosion would occur or suddenly a black hole would come which would suck the world inside it. Or suddenly a meteorite or an asteroid will hit the earth. Or something on these lines would occur. But unfortunately nothing happened. I don’t know why, but I actually wanted the world to end. Maybe just to witness the event, but I really badly wanted the world to end.

I was even about to write my own guide about “How to Survive a Zombie Apocalypse” or “Surviving a Zombie Apocalypse for Dummies” thinking it would come in handy on December 21, but I never went beyond deciding the title of the book. Looks like it was a good thing I never bothered to work on that book, all of my hard work would’ve gone waste.   

So many theories even pointed to the world ending at around this time. It was not just the Mayans. Biblical references said so too. And the list goes on of other people who thought the world would end. The Sibylline Prophecies. Quatrains of Nostradamus. But the Mayans were the ones who had pinpointed an exact date while the others had only given a general picture of this time, so I will express my anger towards the Mayans by saying, “The Mayans screwed us over by giving us hope that the world is going to come to an end”. Stupid, useless hope.

And apparently it was not just me who was looking forward to the world ending. A bunch of other people were too. I was reading on Al Jazeera’s website about all the preparations that the people had made to celebrate the end of the world or honour the end of the world, or whatever you would like to call it. In Varansai, India, people came to offer prayers and take shelter; as Varansi is a holy city it was believed that when doomsday occurs, Varansai will remain intact. In Russia, a museum sold tickets for like a thousand dollars or something for people to stay in former Soviet dictator Joseph (or is it spelled Josef?) Stalin’s bunker so that they can survive doomsday. In China, the wait for doomsday actually resulted in like over a thousand arrests because the people who were circulating doomsday protests must’ve gotten they eye of the authorities. Well, the Al Jazeera article that I quoted in this article is located here if you want to read it. Unfortunately I still do not know how to create hyper links. I couldn’t code stuff even if my life depended on it.

Those people who were “beliefists”, who believed so much in the world ending and the Mayan theory, I wonder how they are coping. I am really curious about that. Maybe they are following the revised Mayan calendar which apparently believes in 2017. (A guest who came over to my place yesterday told about the 2017 revised Mayan calendar, that the world will end January 1, 2017. Personally, it was the first time that I was hearing of any such thing.) 

So I am trying to look at the bright side here. If I ever have any kids I can show them the movie 2012 and say to them, “Look I survived that thing!!” or tell them stories of how I survived the Zombie Apocalypse.

So, when actually will the world end? Out of all of the major theories that speculate the ending of the world, all of them have been spent out, so to speak, with the exception of two. The first possible prediction is for 2028, called The Triple Six Mystery. What it entails, I don’t know. I have read about it, but unfortunately I have been unable to make much sense of it. Apparently it has some basis in Christianity and the next rapture (whatever that is supposed to be) will happen in the year 2028, and following this rapture will be so much instability that the world will just come to an end.

The next prediction is for the year 2280. And this theory is based on Islam. Apparently the Quran has a mathematical code in it and the scientists have managed to break the code and the code says the world will end in Ramadan 1710 according to the Islamic calendar, which corresponds to the year 2280 in the Gregorian calendar.

There is like so much talk about when the world will end, but no talk about how the world will end? Did anyone ever notice that? Well, I admit I just noticed that now while typing out this blog post. And I thought to myself, “Have I heard of any theory about how the world will end?” I am already aware of one theory but I Googled the question for hope of additional information. Turns out all the theories except the one I know of have been proven wrong. Stuff about planetary alignments and the earth banging into this planet known as Planet X and an asteroid hitting the earth. Well, the one theory that I know of can’t be proven right or wrong until the world actually ends. The theory that I know of the theory Islam puts forward – well basically the way Islam describes the end of the world, it sounds as if the end of the world will be due to a nuclear explosion. This is something that cannot be proved or disproved or disregarded until the world ends, so I guess this theory will be standing till the end. I mean, how do you disprove (or prove, for that matter) that a nuclear war will cause the end of the world? Until the world actually ends, that is.
So I guess the wait to the end of the world continues. Whether its 2017 or 2028 or 2280. Or neither of those three years. Only when the world actually ends will we know when is doomsday, but they are three theories still standing so far. And, when it comes to how the world will end, that is something we will only know until the world ends, and for that the nuclear bomb theory is the only one that is still standing. Until the world ends, happy rotting in this crappy God forsaken world. :-)


  1. Now that was an interesting read... We can't predict the end of anything, till it doesn't actually happen... So enjoy the joie de vivre!

    1. Exactly. Predictions are so unreliable. No point believing in them :P

  2. You and me will be waiting forever for this world to end :|... Life is deceiving, so is everything else..Hell!!!! Where am I stuck and Why???

    1. We are destined to sit and rot in this stupid world till it ends :| Make it end already!!

  3. If you believed that, it would be a 'lie'. But If you didn't, then it is a 'joke'.

    I belong to the second category. :D

    1. That is a really interesting way of putting it :D